The Deep Sound of Life After Loss

February 14, 2020 | IN CHRISTINA'S BLOG/POSTS | BY christina

I wish I could play the piano. 

If I did I would find a special key for rejection. 

And it would sound like a drumming sound. 

Piercing through every layer of my heart. 

It would be probing. 

And lengthy. 

It would allow the ears to also know how it feels to be turned down. 

I would then look for the key to depression. 

Slightly more discerning. 

Thin, sharp like a knife. 

Searching to find a place to land within, and stay. 

In hiding. Until the key for rejection is used again. 

And that space depression has sat on, gets bigger and bigger. 

The music begins to sound like you are being dragged to the left and then to the right. 

Drumming at first then probing. 

The sound of torture. 

But wait. Just wait. 

We are missing a key. 

Grief. 

This piano key is like an open window in the cold of winter. 

It’s sound has air to it but the kind that hurts. 

It resembles a melody but it certainly isn’t. (Click to tweet!)

It can be confusing because of its romantic nature to it. 

But it’s the kind of romance that has just ended.

When you bring all three keys together you get a symphony that draws out tears in the dryest eyes. 

The overwhelm of these three together can make someone want to end all the sounds forever. 

One may want to kill that piano forgetting the existence of the other 85 keys because rejection, depression and grief have monopolized the piano player. 

But that open window, that grief forgot to close brings in a new sound. 

This key from the neighbor’s piano is about hope and it sounds almost like OM

Yes that’s right, like the OM you find in meditation. 

Can you hear it? OM OM 

Wait. Wait, there is another sound coming in just after the OM key. 

This one sounds like someone is singing la la la. 

But no voice can mimic this sound. 

Only a key on the piano. 

This one is the key of joy. 

The kind of joy that comes from a child. Innocent. 

And just like that the key of joy goes right after the key of hope. 

OM la la la OM la la. 

And the sounds of depression, grief and rejection are being altered, forever. 

Their loud probing makes a background that amplifies OM enough to make it sound deeper. Possibly the sound of life. 

Drumming and probing still, but with the keys of life sounding la la la ommmmm.

That my friend is the sound of a new chapter for someone who experienced a devastating loss. 

In case you ever wondered how it would all sound. 

Now you know. 

Can you hear it? 

With lots of la la la las,

Christina

P.S. A few more days left to register for our weekend together. You can register here: https://www.1440.org/programs/faculty-led-programs/personal-growth/self-discovery/temple-journey


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