You start out with one small home.
There, you put the toughest memory of your life.
Your saddest story.
The one thing you cry about in bed at night.
You visit it daily.
You bring it out when you can.
You share it with others.
And then one day, something else happens in your life.
Something harder than that first story.
You take the new story in your arms, you welcome it in that same home.
At first, you try to visit them both.
But as soon as you walk in, the two sad stories of your life overwhelm you.
You attempt to heal them together, and it feels really tough to do.
You try to take them out of the house and tell a friend about them both, and it’s too much.
On your way back from your visit with your friend, you decide to build a second home for your new painful story.
You know this is the best thing for everyone.
You will of course visit both stories equally.
But as you grow older you experience many new painful stories.
You now have at least 12 homes. One for each story.
And let’s be honest, lately you barely get the chance to visit most of them.
The most painful stories hardly see you anymore.
You don’t even wave as you pass by each one of their homes.
It is too much for you to even glance at them, never mind take them out and share them with your family and friends, especially with the new people in your life.
As more time goes by these new people don’t even know your most painful moments.
They may have heard about two or three of them the most.
But they certainly could not imagine there are that many others.
They have never been discussed.
I remember a few months ago, I told someone relatively new in my life one of my sad stories.
One that was quite important but was never shared before.
There was not even a prior hint of its existence.
I saw my friend’s eyes widen with surprise.
You see, most people have many painful memories.
Airing them all at the same time can be traumatic.
Compartmentalizing them can save our lives.
Dear friend, I know you have built many beautiful homes for your most painful memories.
And you had to restrict visitations to some of them so you could go on.
But now and again, we meet a person who can help us carry them all out for a visit.
It is rare. Of course it is.
But when that person, possibly a multiple home builder themselves, comes into your life and together you share all of your stories, you can save not just yourselves but all the generations ahead of you.
With many untold stories,
P.S. SEE YOU IN TWO WEEKS at 1440 Multiversity. A few more spots left. Register here: https://www.1440.org/programs/faculty-led-programs/personal-growth/self-discovery/temple-journey