Have I been Faithful To Myself?
I was interviewing Dr. Parker J. Palmer, an extraordinary poet, writer, change maker. And in the middle of the interview, he asked me if I was faithful to my gift. My eyes must have widened quite a bit. My brain repeated. Faithful to my gift? How would that look like? I thought about us in […]
The Two Moons
It’s late Thursday evening as I am writing to you. And the dark of the night makes for a deeper connection between us. It’s almost as if we slightly step out of space so we are closer together. It will be morning when you are reading this letter, night when I am writing it, and […]
Something Is Coming
I have always known when something was about to change in my life. Sometimes I would know it for years beforehand. I would tell people I know something is coming. Something is coming. The change itself was invisible. I felt the enormity of it. But there were no signs of what exactly was coming. Just […]
Safe Worlds
I have a few favorite movies I watch over and over again. They are my safe worlds. I go to them when a day has been hard. I put them on and sit to watch as if for the very first time. My brain rests while entering a familiar world, witnessing someone else’s life. Crying […]
Don’t You Give Up
Sometimes it will feel as if nothing makes sense. Nothing at all. You can’t fathom why bad things happen to you. Even though you try. You did everything you could to change the course of your life. You ran when you were supposed to run. You climbed when the hill appeared in front of you. […]
The Good Letter
I have been working longer hours lately and today I didn’t get a chance to sit and write you a letter. You may think, but this is a letter isn’t it? It is but it’s not the letter I was going to write. It is just a letter telling you that I ran out of […]
You Didn’t Leave
What if you were free. To be what you feel To scream out your name. And jump inside the pain Would you? Live in it. Be in it Without fright. Just you walking in pleight. With yourself in mind. Would you? Would you do it? If it was true To live not feeling blue To […]
Find Your Lava
I have been seeing a therapist lately. We are trying to figure out how the heck did I change so much since the loss of my husband. Sometimes I wonder, did someone come in and replace me? I know it sounds crazy and of course nobody replaced me but it feels like someone else is […]
Why Don’t You Put Some Makeup On?
I posted a video about the Life Reentry class on facebook the other day and a woman commented under it, why don’t you put some makeup on Christina? At first, I responded casually. I did have some makeup on, but it’s been a long day of zoom calls and work. And then I started thinking […]
Endings
It was not like any other day. Something was in the air. A heaviness, with no name. A knowing. A goodbye. An Ending. A full stop. And it was known. Nothing could prevent it. Nothing at all. It was coming. Like all endings do. The Ending arrived quietly. Almost like a whisper. “I am here, […]